Tag Archives: forgiveness
Forgiveness In Mercy
At some time in our relationships, all of us do something that we need forgiveness and mercy. The sincerely happy one is one who lives in an attitude of forgiveness, not defending grudges or keeping the error over the head of the faulty one. Denying to give mercy will stop our obtaining mercy. The eternal law of Yahweh shows that we harvest what we sow. When Jesus commands on mercy, He is prohibiting one of the extremely toxic emotions anyone can ever have. Bitterness can destroy not only a relationship but also a soul. The Bible cautions us to beware of the fatal power of bitterness: Be careful that no one fails to receive Yahweh’s grace and begins to cause trouble between you. A person like that can ruin many of you (Hebrews 12:15). Bitterness does two things: it disturbs us, and it dishonors others.
Our unwillingness to forgive anyone will kill our relationships. It will give us high blood pressure, ulcers, colitis, and it will make our children angry and rebellious. We clearly cannot afford the indulgence of keeping grudges. We need to love and forgive or we die.
We night feel that we are the one who always forgives. This is a situation that bothered the disciples, too: Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, when my fellow believer sins against me, how many times must I forgive him? Should I forgive him as many as seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, you must forgive him more than seven times. You must forgive him even if he wrongs you seventy times seven (Matthew 18:21-22). The words of Christ are not always easy to live by, but they need to be followed.
Note: I experienced many years of abuse [many types]. I held onto that and felt animosity toward my abusers. At some point along the way with Yahweh’s help, I let it go and forgave all of them. That’s when the healing began. It’s taken more than 15 years to for this healing process to work itself out. I can finally see light at then end of the tunnel. You can too.
Describe what holding a grudge has done to you and your relationships. Comment your experience. And, we’ve “all” experienced this at some point in our lives.
Describe what releasing the grudge has done for you and your relationships. Comment your experience. If you haven’t yet, why not?
Do you need prayer? Contact me here for prayer. I have a prayer team waiting to pray for you.
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God Imitators
The character that we bear of God’s children obliges us to resemble Him, especially in His love and goodness, in His mercy and readiness to forgive.
As the sacrifice of Christ was satisfyingly effective with God, so His example should be prevailing with us, and we should carefully copy it.
There’s no room for evildoing! You don’t do evildoing, you say? Are you sure of that?
Let’s do a quick mental check:
- Expressing a bad attitude
- Hoping for someone else’s bad fortune
- Plotting revenge
Need I go on?
Over the years I’ve noticed a trend in people expressing their minds about how they believe so and so deserves to get a taste of their own medicine. That kind of thinking is sinful. Yahweh isn’t particularly excited that we’re thinking, talking, nor acting on this attitude. It’s clear in His word!
Yes, on occasion I’ve fallen prey to that thinking. I’m not immune to sin. Shocker, I know! None of us is immune to sin. We’re born into it. Yahweh’s word tells us we are. Go see for yourselves. I encourage you to pour over and delve into His word. Learn what it says. Be imitators of HIM! Not imitators of the world.
Are you an imitator of Yahweh? If so, comment your experience. Let’s talk.
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The Ugly Need Love Too
Today’s Word:
In their ugliness to us, our enemies often make themselves so obnoxious that no one else can possibly love them. May we say, “I love them the most because if I didn’t, no one else would.” Such love can be learned as we spend more and more time with our Lord. He taught us and then showed us how to love and pray.
How are you at showing love and praying, even for the ugly in your life? Comment and let me know!
Me: I was asked the other night how I could forgive and love those who hurt me in life. Because, by example, Jesus did. I owe Him that much!
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Forgiveness | Part 4
Five-Steps to Forgiveness
- Admit the pain
- Any offense creates pain. In an effort to ignore it we deny the pain. It’s our pride that stops us from dealing with it. We take an attitude of ignoring it because we don’t want to admit it hurt. This allows resentment to build and fester creating bitterness, which is a spiritual disease. This causes us to gradually isolate and alienate ourselves from God and the church body. This behavior keeps us from healing.
- Instead, understanding the offense is the beginning of healing.
- Work through the confusion
- When an offense happens, we, need to clearly and carefully figure out responsibilities in the situation. We need to establish solid ground within ourselves — to lay boundaries and safeguard them when limits are invaded.
- Look for facts
- Once we understand who’s responsible for what we can move to the next step to figure why the offender offended us. This keeps us from being persistent on a single purpose to get revenge. It may behoove us, if possible, to question others to gain information on the matter, or, as the saying goes, walk a mile in the offender’s shoes.
- No excuses. Information alone is important.
- When the truth appears it’s easier to move forward into restoration.
- Grant facts to be wisdom
- Often when facts become clear our self-talk overrides reality and throws us into a pity party, bitterness, and anger.
- It takes a brave effort to move past the pain, to understand, and say “I forgive you.” Do not relive the events over and over. It’s done.
Think about the torture Jesus was put through. He could’ve easily gone violent ninja and took the lot of them out. What did He do though? In Luke 23:34a – Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” He forgave them. - Forgiveness is a gift of God’s grace. The wonder of it is that God gives us wisdom into our own heart and involves us with Him in the freeing the offender.
- Choose to renounce the whole situation
- Here’s story to relay renouncing hurts/offenses:
| The Trouble Tree – Author Unknown The carpenter I hired to help me restore an old farmhouse had just finished a rough first day on the job. A flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric saw quit, and now his ancient pickup truck refused to start. While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. On arriving, he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching the tips of the branches with both hands. When opening the door he underwent an amazing transformation. His tanned face was wreathed in smiles and he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss. Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed the tree and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier. “Oh, that’s my trouble tree,” he replied.” I know I can’t help having troubles on the job, but one thing’s for sure, troubles don’t belong in the house with my wife and the children. So I just hang them on the tree every night when I come home. Then in the morning I pick them up again.” He paused. “Funny thing is,” he smiled, “when I come out in the morning to pick ’em up, there ain’t nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before.” |
I know this is a simple story. However, when we give up reliving events over and over they diminish their impact. They don’t seem quite as offensive as we first allowed them to be. It’s all about our attitude.
When we are offended, stop, think about how Jesus handled offenses. Allow the Holy Spirit to wash over you and fill you will God’s grace.
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Forgiveness – Part 3
What forgiveness is!
- Forgiveness is returning to God the right to take care of justice.
- By refusing to transfer the right to exact punishment or revenge, we are telling God we don’t trust him to take care of matters.
- Forgiveness is a process, not an event.
- It might take some time to work through our emotional problems before we can truly forgive. Forgiveness doesn’t happen overnight. However, as soon as we can, we should decide to forgive, but it probably is not going to happen right after a tragic situation. It’s okay.
- We have to forgive every time.
- If we find ourselves constantly forgiving, though, we might need to take a look at the dance we are doing with the other person that sets us up to be continually hurt, attacked, or abused.
- If they don’t repent, we still have to forgive.
- Even if they never ask, we still need to forgive. We should memorize and repeat over and over: Forgiveness is about our attitude, not their action.
- We might forgive too quickly to avoid pain or to manipulate the situation.
- Forgiveness releases pain and frees us from focusing on the other person. Too often when we’re in the midst of the turmoil after a tragedy, we desperately look for a quick fix to make it all go away. Some women want to “hurry up” and forgive so the pain will end, or so they can get along with the other person. We have to be careful not to simply cover our wounds and retard the healing process.
- Forgiveness starts with a mental decision.
- The emotional part of forgiveness is finally being able to let go of the resentment. Emotional healing may or may not follow quickly after we forgive. It takes time.
Forgiveness quotes:
| “Always forgive your enemies – nothing annoys them so much.” – Oscar Wilde |
| “He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.” – George Herbert |
If Yahweh doesn’t hold onto sin and He throws them away why do we continue to hold onto them, being unforgiving?
There’s another quote that I like that goes like this:
| “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” – Lewis B. Smedes |
Will you set yourself free, now?
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Forgiveness – Part 2
What forgiveness is not.
- Forgiveness is not allowing the offender/offense to be released.
- We can and should still hold others accountable for their actions or lack thereof.
- Forgiveness is not letting the offense continue over and over again.
- We don’t have to tolerate, nor should we keep ourselves open to, lack of respect or any form of abuse.
- Forgiveness does not mean we have to return to being the victim.
- Forgiving is not saying, “What you did was okay, so go ahead and walk all over me.” Nor is it playing the martyr (a person who undergoes severe or constant suffering), because it perpetuates our victim role.
- Forgiveness is not the same as reconciling (making peace).
- We can forgive someone even if we are unable to get along with him/her again.
- Forgiveness is not based on others’ actions but on our attitude.
- People will continue to hurt us through life. We can either look away from them or stay stuck and angry, or we can begin to keep our minds on our loving relationship with God, knowing and trusting in what is good.
- Forgiveness does not mean forgetting.
- It’s normal for memories to be triggered in the future. When thoughts of past hurts occur, it’s what we do with them that counts. When we find ourselves focusing on a past offense, we can learn to say, “Thank you, Yahweh, for this reminder of how important forgiveness is.”
It’s important to forgive because Yahweh sees your heart and knows it. Sincerely forgiving allows Yahweh to forgive you.
In today’s scripture, verse 26 says that if we don’t forgive neither will Yahweh forgive us. What that’s saying is that unforgiveness eats away at your soul and will make it die and turning you into a bitter and angry person toward Yahweh and the world.
The quote below says it very well:
| One great errand to the throne of grace is to pray for the pardon of our sins; and care about this ought to be our daily concern. – Matthew Henry |
Release your unforgiveness to Yahweh. Allow His peace to wash over you and allow yourself forgiveness as you forgive others too.
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Forgiveness – Part 1
Our first step is learning what forgiveness is and is not.
What is forgiveness? There’s many definitions from different people. What is the dictionary’s definition?
The dictionary says it means: to pardon (excuse) an offense or an offender.
Forgiving an offense or offender is not an easy thing for most people to do. Why is that?
The one thing we need to keep in mind is that satan has a hand in helping us hold onto negativity. It gives him the upper hand in our emotional state. He likes to keep us down and out. I’m not immune. It’s happened to me and on occasion still happens.
What’s the big deal about forgiveness? Why is it so important? In this series I’ll do my best to break it down to help make it clearer to see.
One thing is for sure. The longer we hold onto unforgiveness the harder it is to let go. The more damage it will do. Why? That will be covered in this series as well.
| “It’s one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody.” Maya Angelou |
We need healthy boundaries so we are able to learn to give ourselves permission to forgive.
In today’s scripture Jesus gives an example of himself forgiving us by us accepting his blood as the new agreement for forgiveness of sin.
In the next part I’ll share what that means and why it’s important.
In the meantime, give yourselves permission to forgive. Spend time in prayer with Yahweh and allow the Holy Spirit to wash over you and feel the gift of His forgiveness in your life.
Have you experienced forgiveness? If so, comment, and share with us and bless someone today.
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Why You Need To Forgive
People struggle with forgiveness!
The natural reaction is to want to punish or get revenge on the one who hurt us.
Today’s scripture tells us Yahweh is the ultimate forgiver. When we repent and accept The Messiah – Yeshua as our Savior Yahweh erases our sins and forgets them. It’s for His own sake. Because Yahweh is unable to be in the presence of sin. Because of His very nature: He is sinless. He is perfect. He is holy. He simply will not tolerate sin. Paul warns the willfully rebellious in Romans 2:5.
But you are stubborn and refuse to change, so you are making your own punishment even greater on the day he shows his anger. On that day everyone will see God’s right judgments. — Romans 2:5
There’s 5 types of forgiveness:
- human forgiveness, that of people extending forgiveness toward others
- divine forgiveness, Yahweh’s forgiving human beings
- unilateral forgiveness, one sided forgiveness – See Matthew 5 below.
- complete forgiveness, bilateral – Yeshua gives us this when we repent and accept Him as our Savior. 1 John 1:9 tells us:
But if we confess our sins, he will forgive our sins, because we can trust God to do what is right. He will cleanse us from all the wrongs we have done. — 1 John 1:9
- living in forgiveness, It includes seeking forgiveness from God through the redemptive work of Yeshua The Messiah and seeking complete forgiveness from anyone we have offended if, of course, they are available to forgive us. To live as completely forgiven is the right and joy of the committed Christian. It may involve going back to others who we have hurt through the years. It is an important aspect of moving towards the victorious Christian life.
An unforgiving spirit leads to bitterness, anger, and resentment. A heart with that type of attitude is not able to have true fellowship with Yahweh. Not holding grudges allows a state of mind that is ready and willing to forgive. Reconciliation is the goal, and if there cannot be reconciliation, a willingness to forgive must be maintained. There can be no excuse for withholding forgiveness from others. Matthew 5 tells us:
But I tell you, if you are angry with a brother or sister, you will be judged. If you say bad things to a brother or sister, you will be judged by the council. And if you call someone a fool, you will be in danger of the fire of hell.
“So when you offer your gift to God at the altar, and you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there at the altar. Go and make peace with that person, and then come and offer your gift. — Matthew 5:22-24
To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you. Lewis B. Smedes
Do you live a victorious Christian life? The quote by Lewis B. Smedes is an eye opener. I’ve experienced this in my life. When I did my expression was, “I feel like a caged bird set free”. Picture a bird cage with the door flying open and I fly out into freedom. Is this your experience? If not, would like to experience it? Forgive! It’s liberating.
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